Someone jumped over our wall last night. I was watching TV and ironing clothes and my daughter was about to go to bed. It was just one of those days. So when the security guards knocked on our door and gave us the news we were all a bit rattled. When anything out of the ordinary happens I think back to all those esoteric books I loved reading. Then I ask myself just why it happened.

Truthfully those books helped me cope. They were the reason why I could make up with my sister-in-law (who I had mad beef with) or forgive my father who was a bit of a bastard. And they all stress the same thing :  your attention should always be focused on the things you want in your life. This is why I think about my insane family and music all the time….

Yet every now and then something happens to snap me out of the bubble I created for myself. When that happens it feels as though some cosmic dude tapped me on my back and said, “That’s nice, the life you have for yourself, but take a look at this please.”  It’s not that I am oblvious to crime and poverty but I, honestly, just don’t look at it too closely. And on the day that my  best friend and I went into the township schools…it was all I could see.

Imagine my shock when I saw a shebbeen right on top of a school. In fact there were drunks stumbling out of the place while the kids were eating lunch a few yards away. Then we drove up to another school, and lordy lord I locked my door immediately, that had a chop shop directly opposite it. Some enterprising criminals even cut off access to one of the roads by using a very big tree stump. And all around there were dodgy looking cars and even dodgier looking people.

In all these schools there was hardly any space for kids to really move about or play or a stitch of grass. In my head I was thinking, “Why would anyone be concerned about kids brining weapons to school. All they have to do here is pick up a brick!” There was dirt and rubble all over the place.

The only thing that redeemed those schools were the teachers. Teachers who despite everything get up in the morning and do more than just their job. .And just like that I was snatched out of my bubble and forced to think about things other than music and my family. There was only one question I had to answer, “What will I do now?”

My daughter loves a good old gossip. Since the start of this year she has been spending more time in her room and reading these silly magazines. When I asked her why she said, “It’s interesting!” She does not care that the articles are seldom true or factual. She just likes that it’s juicy and that someone somewhere is getting into trouble….lol!

Every now and then I hear, “Oh, no! I can’t believe it!” as she reads in her room. Look, I get it. She is just a small girl and her life is not all that interesting just yet. So she reads to inject some excitement into her life. I did the same too – only with horror books and short stories. And I got the most terrible nightmares as a result… but I was always entertained…

Our real lives are so much more entertaining than the stuff we see on tv. All you really have to do is take a deeper look. But not everyone wants to deal with their real life drama. And I am just as guilty. I would spend hours hunting down a particular tv series or watch them back to back than deal with the many things that are wrong or just missing in my life.

I remember just how upset and disgusted my daughter was when the nude pictures of Vanessa Hutchins surfaced. “So, are you telling me you didn’t know she had boobs and a vagina?” I asked. She did not find my comment amusing. I am trying to get her to see through all the crap and media hype. That at the end of the day – people are just people. Flawed and imperfect. Right now I don’t think she cares. She just wants to be distracted and entertained..

His name was Daryl and I sat next to him on the plane ride back to Cape Town. No, I did not try to chat him up! We spoke about random things… like all the babies that made sleep impossible  for the poor man…lol!.

Look, I won’t lie I have tons of great news so share. Being invited to the Montreux Jazz Festival in Switzerland is only one of them. The last thing I want is that people think I am pretentious or bragging  – so I keep my news to myself mostly. And as Daryl talked I wondered…am I really paying attention? Was there an equal exchange of information going on here?

So often we exchange bullshit conversations just to pass time. “What did you think of that rugby match?” or “Shit, this traffic just won’t end!”I wish I could say that every conversation I had was meaningful somehow. And honestly sometimes you just want to talk shit. Sometimes I want to bitch and go on a mad rant and let your mind wonder aimlessly…

Still talking to Daryl got me thinking about how easily we hide behind our words. What’s really terrible is that we lie to those people closest to us. They ask us a question and instead of telling the truth we say, “It’s nothing, it can wait” or we just close down altogether. I did that a while back and literally could not breathe because of it. In the end I simply had say something.

He spoke about his job and the beers he was looking forward to. I spoke about music and my daughter. Then we said our good byes…it was short, sweet and to the point. If only all the conversations I needed to have could be that way…eish…